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Slow, steady, here.

Updated: Feb 5, 2023

In the midst of a subtle conversation about GOD, I often find myself being triggered on the topic of Religion. It is in these moments where I begin to feel uncomfortable that I find what I am looking for.........release.

.....So I beg the question;

"What is it that I'm craving?"

My soul spoke "Something Deeper……"

Something Real, relatable……from the heart.

I crave to touch other dimensions, Other light-years,

I want to reach for desire without fear, I want to grasp the beauty of experience without the resistance of pain……It hurts to heal.

.....because I feel it. It's barren…….dark, lonely.

Fully exposing the broken yet hopeful versions of me

I can't help but resist the Shedding of my exterior.

I know when I feel like this, Clarity seeks to find me.

I am learning to trust myself……

learning to let go; Flow.

So let me be real......

I feel Sad.

My emotion is powerful without takes me to a place where I am so bare that I recognize I am exalted, liberated in these very weak moments of true surrender.

Then I come back…..and my body remembers its place……it's lane, its structure. I want to escape my own walls & Barriers. I want to let myself cry and know exactly which part of me calls from my sorrow.

I feel like I always have to explain myself, protect myself, defend myself. And if I am soft, I am not heard. But If I am strong in my stance, I am intimidating, feared, defiant. Which part of me knows this balance? Which part of me knows the connection?

I feel fearless when I weep. There is no time to fear, no part of me energetic enough to entertain my illusions…….all the power placed in my Breath; The Now.………

The best prayers are the ones not spoken; but where I am received in my descending…..sinking, allowing…….melting. Where I can be looked at from the inside out by the one who sits Greater than I; and even in my dismay, I am looked at with perfect eyes……

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